the hiphop revisionist

and so

blah blah blah blahblahblahblahblah

seriously boring my writing is.

question: what is a jay-z anti-war mp3 without jay-z?
answer: a punjabi mc song.

grrrr.... i'm still kinda diggin it though ;) just wish there was a little jay in there somewhere...
must plug back into a p2p network somewhere... and soon.

note to self -- also, for future reference: tupac . changes

audio: punjabi mc . mundian to bach ke       -|[ jayz version is "beware the boys (remix)" ]|-

eco

recently, it seems that good friends are proving themselves to be alot more like family than blood relations.

my self-image is losing its balance; the balance of familiar things [the martial arts school, college, work -- all stories to be told later, or never] is falling away. the safety of routine expectations is being rubbed raw -- the everyday events of even a day's past become increasingly remote and meaningless.

i look back at that life and it wasn't worth keeping. i was stuck in a rut, and of course, there's the old saying is that the only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth ;)

it's a frightening clarity, though: the clearer my mind, the less i have to live for, in a strange way...

... but also, it's as if the less i have to live for, the more i see things without obsessing over hypothetical shadows... the mental chessgame that is "the future" quiets down, in a way. i just have to take advantage of the chance to be empty and see things without the blinders that held me in place.

and get rid of this damn sadness...
but then, that's what friends are for.

i guess... ?

or maybe i should keep it.

where is the balance between apathy and detachment?

it's a strange thing to realize that after i die, the world will go on perfectly well without me.

it's even stranger to realize that i've known it all along, yet i tend to forget.

how many planets would an earth full of me-clones require?

...

lucidity «- -» obscurity
see also META

does memory fill the gap between sensation and perception?
» if so, how much of the world do i create within my mind?

the beauty of a photograph lies in that which remains unseen; what can be sensed but not perceived. having looked at a tree, seeming to shimmer in the captured sunlight, is it necesssary to count the leaves? Is it even possible to count the leaves without losing the larger holarchic [ 1 ] cohesion of the still image?

one possible application of computer technology in the creation of art could be the restoration of complexity within the composition process. one of the most difficult aspects of using a brush [or ink, or charcol or pastels] is creating the illusion of depth and detail through the strategic use of light, shadow and color. why not bring those illusions to life instead? it is possible to evolve trees in a simulated environment using unpredictable interactions between the host environment's constituent cellular automata [ 1 ]. and yet, it would seem that the use of perceptual interactions between simple forms to create a convincing "picture" of something far more complex lies within the province of the truly inventive artist.

just as a series of undecidable computations gives rise to an emergent dynamic reality, so can a great artist excite worlds of complexity within the minds of those who witness the fruits of his labor, although his achievement may consist of a single brush stroke. the advantage of suggestion [rather than descriptive indication] is that the truth of the mystery is as much a matter of the beholder's apperceptive powers as it is a question of the artist's demonstrative abilities.

the beauty of simplicity lies within the number of paths that can be taken to reach that simplicity, and the number of steps taken along the way.

audio: beegees . stayin alive